“Not many artists commit suicide by leaping off the pinnacle of success.” -Anonymous

New evidence surrounding Nirvana-front man Kurt Cobain's 1994 suicide has surfaced. Many fans of the Seattle-based grunge band contend that the circumstances surrounding the singer's death were more than mysterious; his wife, Courtney Love, is a popular suspect for his murder. However, a "first draft" of Cobain's suicide note has been discovered among a cache of 1980's pop records auctioned off after his death.

An image of the letter, now confirmed by handwriting experts to be from Cobain, has been released to the press:
Van, 33, of Rogers City, MI, came across the note while moving out of his parents' basement. "They said with the economy how it is, they needed to rent out the basement to someone who would actually pay rent," Van said in an interview. "I was getting together all my Nirvana memorabilia - they're my favorite band! - when this piece of paper fell out of the sleeve of Kurt Cobain's copy of Culture Club's single 'Karma Chameleon.'"

It seems appropriate that Cobain would hide his first attempt at writing his suicide note amongst his collection of 1980's pop music. In the body, he explains his distress at discovering one of his band's biggest singles, "Smells Like Teen Spirit," was able to perfectly provide the instrumental backtrack to Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up." Now commonly known as "Rickrolling," it appears Kurt Cobain himself was the first to discover the horrors of being unpleasantly surprised by Rick Astley, tragically over his own music. Reading the body of the letter, Cobain could not recover from this terrible shock, and the resulting depression and existential crisis following drove him to take his own life.

The suicide note specifically mentions the act of Cobain killing himself. In the final version of the note found near Cobain's dead body, there is some ambiguity as to whether it was a letter to accompany his suicide, or whether it was a note to his wife and daughter telling them he was leaving. In the latter theory, many fans hold that Cobain was only going to walk out on his wife and daughter, in the hopes of giving them a better life, when Love murdered him and set it up to look like a suicide. With the discovery of this first draft of the note, this speculation will likely be put to rest.

Perhaps most ironic in this latest find is that, despite Cobain's distraught writing after realizing how "poppy" his songwriting had become, he took the time to make stylistic edits to his suicide note. In his notes, Cobain seems quite concerned with his image postmortem. He observes that his language could be more flowery in the opening paragraph, and that the tone of the entire piece should "sound darker, more depressed." The king of grunge rock, Devil-may-care attitude of the 1990's was just as concerned with the legacy of his life, death, and music, as any other sellout.

When asked if the suicide note had any effect on his respect for the singer, Van replied, "No, I don't think so. I mean, yeah, it's kind of gay that the dude liked Rick Astley, but, hey, I'm 33, just got kicked out my parents' basement, and still listen to Nirvana."

" 'The mind is its own place, and in itself/Can make a Heaven of Hell, A Hell of Heaven.' " -John Milton, "Paradise Lost"

I'm still working on changing things up a bit around here, so bear with me as I tinker.

You may notice the title has changed. My musings have expanded beyond the musical, so I thought the title needed updating along with the rest of the overhaul.

Additionally, I found out that I can update from my phone. We'll see where this goes, because I'm not entirely sure how I feel about blog updates in only 160 characters. I may leave that to Twitter, and keep this website open as avenue for more lengthy, detailed looks into my mind, which is made of largely of self-absorption and depravity. (As a side note, it smells oddly of my own flatulence and Astroglide; fans of "South Park" and pornography should appreciate those references.)

I appreciate everyone sticking with me and reading this; my ego thanks you all as well (especially if you decide to become a follower!). My Facebook page will have an update every time I update here, so keep checking back often. Follow my Twitter page (link on the sidebar) for more current information about my escapades, too. And if you want to hear a couple of recordings of clarinet performances given by yours truly, look for me on MySpace (or just click the link below my Twitter page). Most important, however, is that you tell all your friends about this blog. I have a terrible hunger for attention that only more followers (and commenters!) can sate.

Just so you all know that I am aware of my narcissism, I do realize that the previous paragraph was transparent, blatant, and shameless whoring. Oh well, my talent isn't going to sell itself without some serious pimping.

"Our best thoughts come from others." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

I would like to announce that this blog will have a GUEST AUTHOR! My good friend Aric will be submitting his first post in the near future, and will likely be making appearances every now and then.

Enjoy reading! I know this first post will be a killer.

"Women are the only oppressed group in our society that lives in intimate association with their opressors." ~Evelyn Cunningham

Republicans are once again attacking women's rights. First, conservatives tried to prevent women from voting, which kept them second-class citizens. Then they fought to prevent women from entering the workforce, binding them in the shackles of domestic servitude. And until 1973, women didn't even have full reproductive rights! Now Republicans are attempting to prevent women from protecting themselves in the case of brutal sexual assault and rape.

You may have heard of Rapex, the female condom designed to temporarily disable potential rapists, and leave evidence of the attempted rape. The condom has rows of tiny teeth which attach themselves to the attacker's penis, and can only be removed surgically, which, theoretically, would lead the attacker to seek medical attention, at which point he would also be arrested. Scientists are now able to take this concept a step further. After five years of research, a simple operation has been developed to attach appendages of a bonelike material resembling teeth to the vaginal walls, empowering women to defend themselves in case of sexual assault. Women who wish to undergo Steinem-Fonda Surgery - currently legal only in Sweden, Japan, and select tattoo and piercing parlours in Thailand - must undergo three months of physical training based on Kegel exercises, in order to gain the necessary control of the pelvic floor muscles to effectively use these implanted "teeth." The more widespread this procedure becomes (and the knowledge of its relative ubiquity) has the potential to reduce the incidence of rape to almost zero, an amazing prospect for women and society at large.

But top Senate congresspersons are fighting against this newest chance to liberate women from the paralyzing fear of sexual assault. In the most recent health care bill mark up in committee, Republicans, and some "Blue Dog" Dems, are supporting the big insurance companies' policies which classify this surgery as "elective" - meaning the procedure would not be covered by many insurance policies, effectively limiting the protection it offers to only those who could pay out of pocket. Additionally, many House Republicans have proposed legislation to ban the procedure in the United States. Both House and Senate opponents cite cost and women's safety in establishing their positions, but what lies beneath this seemingly rational façade is the ugly face of sexism.

What all these congressmen (yes, everyone who has spoken against the procedure has been a man) are really supporting is continuing to keep a woman's right to her body in the hands of a "moral authority." Many of the most outspoken dissenters often tout their evangelical beliefs in other aspects of their public policy, so why should we believe this situation is any different? Their religious values teach that women are to be subservient to men, especially their husbands, and to empower females with defense against lascivious and aggressive men is an idea diametrically opposed to the conservatives' view of male dominance. The evangelical movement believe the Bible supports their position, and have even begun a propaganda campaign. A major "family values-centered" Christian organization recently released a feature-length filmed entitled Teeth, a cautionary tale to the "slippery slope" to which they see this procedure leading. In the film, the main character Dawn, a good Christian girl at the outset, embarks upon a spree of seduction followed by violent acts against the men she lures in after she discovers her vagina dentata (the medical term for a vagina with these "teeth"). The filmmakers highlight her aggressive and devious nature in many ways. Initially, she seems to be committed to the Christian ideals of remaining a virgin until marriage; she even wears a purity ring. However, she is portrayed as luring her first victim, also steadfast in his vows against pre-marital intimacy, into a spot well-known for copulation. Throughout the film she repeats these actions, becoming more and more promiscuous - and bloodthirsty. The argument in the film is that if women are allowed to have this surgery, the protection it affords will become a weapon against all men. In short, the opponents of this procedure are misogynistic, chauvinistic and afraid of ceding any societal power to women.

Just as in prison, rape is often an assertion of superiority, a way of establishing social strata. If this procedure is banned in the United States, it will be an effective rape of women's rights, the conservative male's declaration of his authority over his female counterpart. We cannot stand idly by during the Right's continued attack on women and the freedom to make their own choices about their bodies. I strongly urge all of my readers to write your congressMAN and tell him to support the right of women to have teeth implanted in their vaginas.

"Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius and power and magic in it." -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

I just listened to this EP, Ladybug, by Katerina Hope, and, for old time's sake (and to support up-and-coming and local artists), I thought I'd throw up a review:


Upon first meeting Katerina Hope, one will most likely find her quiet, even timid; but her soft-spoken Southern genteel belies an unexpected musical passion that betrays her Jersey roots. Armed with just a guitar and her voice, Ms. Hope brought this veiled energy from Sugar Hill, Georgia and first began to trouble the waters of the New York indie music scene in the fall of 2008. There, according to the bio provided on her MySpace page (found here), she "plays at local hot spots such as the Bitter End and the Bowery Poetry Club," where her lyricism has caught the attention of the likes of poet Michael Rechtenwald.

With the release of her first studio-recorded EP, Ladybug, Katerina Hope is about to make a splash. Her catchy guitar riffs, which often utilize chords somewhat atypical in her line of indie folk (she is currently a Music Composition major at New York University), are both aurally entertaining and stimulating, not to mention the fact that they'll stick in your head long after the songs end. Even more impressive though is her voice. Ms. Hope can wrench the listener's heart with her soft, haunting melodies, before belting out fervid proclamations of love and loss, submerging the listener in the seas of her pain and passion.

Ladybug consists of six tracks, mixing her solo guitar work with pieces using a full studio band. Both styles suit Katerina Hope just fine, displaying her wide range of musical and emotional ability. Were I one with more clout in the music business, or even just as the interested listener I am, I would keep an eye (and ear) out in the coming months and years for Katerina Hope. This EP bodes well for the music to come.

"Things alter for the worse spontaneously, if they be not altered for the better designedly." -Francis Bacon

REFORMAT!

It's quite obvious I've failed at my original endeavour to update every day, as well as to continue listening through my entire iTunes library one album per day, so I've decided that it's time for a retooling of this blog.

Don't worry, my original (and most probably only) fans--this will still be me recklessly dishing out my opinion for my own personal pleasure (although, like the exhibitionist I am, I hope my readers enjoy themselves). However, I will now be expanding my topics of discussion to all the areas of my (constantly-growing) expertise: music, current events, politics, baseball, the media, being a pretentious prick, being a broke college student, and general whoring. (As I expand the areas of my expertise, this list will be updated.)

Keep an eye out for updates, because I'm as interested in how this will turn out as you.

"The people when rightly and fully trusted will return the trust." --Abraham Lincoln

Hey everybody, sorry it's been awhile since my last update. Summer is in full swing now, so I've been pretty busy with work, not to mention the fact that for a full weekend my internet connection was down (I've also begun to get distracted by NPR while in the car--I really missed it!). Anyway, I'm going to attempt to start to catch up here, so the next couple of posts are going to be pretty short and with multiple albums. Here goes:

Batman Begins (Original Motion Picture Soundtrack)
This offering from Hans Zimmer and James Newton Howard is a pretty straightforward movie score. It contains nothing too adventurous in terms of musicality, but it does provide an exciting, percussive, and attention-holding theme to the background of a pretty good movie.

Because of the Times
This is my second Kings of Leon album review, and I have to say I was excited when I saw it come up on the list. Because of the Times is a later work by the quartet, and it really shows. The musical ideas are more developed on this album, leading to an overall more satisfying work than Aha Shake Heartbreak.

The Bedlam in Gotham
The Mars Volta have an interesting sound in general, but definitely on this album. Granted, there are much weirder-sounding groups and genres out there, but for a somewhat mainstream group, The Mars Volta offer a window into the odder side of music.

Begin to Hope
I'm not typically a big fan of piano/voice music, but Regina Spektor makes it interesting for me. She does have the pop "hook" on a couple of tracks, earning her a record deal, but overall, her music is much deeper and richer than those two or three songs. Her piano lines on the rest of the album are somewhat off kilter, with interesting harmonies. I really like this album, which comes as a pleasant surprise.

The Bends
This is Radiohead's second album, and among their best, in my humble opinion. Following Pablo Honey chronologically, the style is very similar, but the listener can hear the band developing more of their own sound, leaning toward more eclectic style and instrumentation. Although Radiohead's sound will eventually become something much different from this album's, this remains among the top offerings from the group, and just one step in their multialbum, multidecade evolution.

Whew...there we go. I'll be back with more tomorrow!